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Dizzying Intellect » Telly

Category: Telly

Minus Size

For anyone who’s curious, here’s the before shots of Whitney, the “plus size” model and winner of this season’s America’s Next Top Model.

So much for I’ve-always-been-overweight-and-every-made-fun-of-me and I-want-to-be-a-good-role-model, huh? What is she, a size 2 there? With every rib showing? Nice.

She was so fake and plastic (and completely incapable of taking direction) for the entire show. Just more fakeness.

New America

I thought the Idol Gives Back show this year was better than last year, and I think Fergie should put out a rock album. (Disclosure: I did donate.) But I was a little put off by Bono’s comments during the results show last night. He said that the three Presidential candidates were all talking about “change” and a “new America.”

And then he said, “The New Americans are the ones who’re donating right now, and that’s the America that I want the world to see.”

I’m not one to hold people’s politics against them — I even have a Dixie Chicks song on my ipod — but snotty condescension is a good way to piss me off. And more importantly

The total amount raised — $22 milllion — fell far short of last year’s $70 million-plus total, and WAY short of their anticipated tally of $100 million.

Sounds like the Old Americans did just fine, sweetie. Shut up and sing.

Sinister!

I had forgotten about this until I heard him on an unrelated commercial this morning, and I hope I’m not the only one who thinks it’s funny:

The guy who does the narration for Forensic Files? Also does the voice on the defibrillators that the Red Cross uses for CPR training.

Capitalism, Patriotism, and Smarm

I’m not going to link this yet, because I don’t know how it’s going to grok, and I don’t want anyone getting flamed.

It comes from an entertainment site, one that’s very good and funny, but one which — like many things entertainment/online — tends a little toward the liberal. The writer is talking about K.L. Cook’s choice to perform ‘God Bless The USA’ on Idol last night. (I thought it was dull as dishwater, but extremely shrewd.)

Idol haters, don’t worry about it. It’s not about Idol. It’s about all of the pro-America songs that the country artists in particular seem to write lately — which seem to have no real point to me, except to give people something to sing at ballgames if they can’t hit the high notes of The Star Spangled Banner.

Anyway, for a liberal-leaning site, this is utterly not what I expected:

America is awesome. When you trot out this bullshit sentimental warmed-over brainless hateful crap, you are seriously disconnecting yourself from America and why it’s great. It’s like Hallmark cards: the opposite of caring. You cannot let somebody else tell you what your heart says.

The real America that is made with blood and bravery and strength and love, the real America that demands that you draw your circle as wide as you can and spend every day serving it with your hands, that goes right out the fucking window when you pass the buck to some stupid shit song like this. And you know who eats it up, because it’s always the same fucking people that eat this vomit, are the people who are too lazy to think about America or love her in the first place.

I hate this fucking song, I hate this stupid girl, and I hate that this is happening, because my whole theory about how this show reflects the wider culture cuts both ways and I don’t want to think about that.

I’m a little embarrassed to this moved by something so snarky and angry, but maybe that’s why I like it so much.

Tell me what you think.

Apocalypse

I can’t believe I’m about to write these words:

How hilarious was Britney Spears on ‘How I Met Your Mother’ last night?

I know it was a tiny part, but she actually has. comedic. timing.

I feel a little woozy. Maybe I’ll go lie down…

What, again?

God, I just realized I’ve been mixing up Charles Nelson Reilly and David Ogden Stiers for at least fifteen years.

Or, rather, I thought they were the same person. I did that with Alan Ruck and Ed Norton too. And Rosario Dawson and Tamara Taylor. And probably others. *sigh*

Jacob vs Locke

Lost spoilers in the extended entry…

Read more »

Urp.

Exit question for Chris Richardson:

Did you know what “Geek In The Pink” meant, before you dedicated it to your grandmother?

I’m not sure there’s a right answer to this one.

Unrivaled kindness

I’m not a big “feel good” story junkie, but this is pretty cool.

A television news anchor donated a kidney to his friend — a colleague at a rival station.

Palmer, who has been with KABC since 1998, told viewers Tuesday that Davis had no shortage of friends willing to help.

“Friends of his lined up to get tested just to see if they could be a living donor, and by giving Dale a kidney also give him a chance at returning to a normal life.

Not just a good guy, but a good guy to a business rival. And in Los Angeles, no less.

Both men are doing just fine.

Another one

I was actually a pretty big fan of Richard Jeni, back when I was in college. A lot of comedians seemed funnier back then. And even though I’d basically forgotten about him, I can’t say I was surprised that he (apparently) killed himself. That whole sad clown thing — comedians’ lives so often don’t live up to the humor on stage.

Anyway, what struck me about this was how sickly he looks in the pictures everyone’s showing of him, and that no one’s mentioning it. Look at this picture and tell me he doesn’t look like he has cancer.