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Dizzying Intellect » 2001» May

dead.

So I’m sailing along on the freeway, when the guy in front of me hits his brakes. No problem, I hit mine. Not even close. Glance up at the rear view, and the semi behind me is still going mach eight. I slam on the gas and pull left as he hits the brakes and swerves right, and he’s still flying when he passes the two cars in front of me, trailing a huge cloud of burnt tire smoke. So I’m thinking, there are so many better ways to die. Which got me considering… Smeared by a semi? Lame. With the life I’ve led, I deserve to be bravely beheaded by rebels, serenely strung up by psychos, at least gunned down as a supposed IRA-operative. Traffic? I hate traffic as it is…

michael stipe

Woohhoo! Michael Stipe’s finally out! Yippee! It’s about time, man. Jeez.

douglas adams

I shouldn’t have looked at cnn.com. Douglas Adams is dead of a heart attack at 49. Goodnight, Zaphod. Godspeed, Dirk.

spring

All of last fall’s bulbs are finally in the ground, this season’s dandelion wine is bottled and in the cellar, and the privacy fence is fixed. I’m ready for fall. Now I can start doing things for fun. Well, I still need to finish painting the trim on the house, so it won’t all be fun. I’m not afraid of heights, but I’m still not looking forward to the 30-foot ladder. But I can put in new annuals and perennials, experiment with Andrew’s donations, get some new rose bushes (I lost two this winter - it was a cold one), and rip out the god-awful ugly birdhouse that has needed to go for a year (and replace it!) And my evil neighbor is moving (believe it or not, I didn’t chase her away, she decided on her own), so I can finally plant flowers on the sunny south side of my house, without risking her coming out to yell at me. Hooray!

lasagne

Fresh Lasagne - best price, special price just for you. How much you willing to pay? Top quality.

matthew

Matthew, Matthew…

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turkey physics

Matt’s First Law of Quantum Physics: Any object smaller than a turkey baster may defy the known natural physical laws.

Thanksgiving was a blast. Matt and I were haggling several months ago over who made better stuffing, potatoes, turkey, etc. And the outcome of the battle was Thanksgiving in April. It was superb, even better for me because Matt did most of the work. And was quite gracious about it - I would have killed me…